Alfie
The only sane person in the room. Alfie is Jimmy and Jenny’s small white Cavapoo, distinguished by the single light-brown patch on his left ear. He is also, quietly, the most intelligent character in the entire Grown-Up Tales universe. Alfie understands exactly what is happening. He notices the obvious flaw in Jimmy’s plan. He knows Jenny is making a terrible decision. He recognises the Tax Man before anybody else. He can see the catastrophe coming several pages in advance. Unfortunately, Alfie is a dog and cannot tell anybody. His entire existence is therefore spent desperately communicating through increasingly horrified facial expressions while the humans confidently destroy their lives around him. Strengths: intelligence, judgement, loyalty, common sense. Weaknesses: cannot speak English. Natural habitat: staring directly at the reader as if to say “Are you seeing this?” Greatest tragedy: he’s always right.